19 June 2006

Changing the World One Brassiere at a Time

I remember going to the mall as a middle schooler, driven by the freshly-earned babysitting money burning in my pocket and seventeen magazine's latest article on smiley face shirts and patterned Doc Martens. The mall presented so many options appealingly showcased behind each store's spotlighted front windows - except for one. Victoria's Secret.
I always averted my eyes when walking by that store lest a fellow mall-goer notice my longing looks at the pink lacy panties and scandalous black brassieres displayed in the window. Somehow I felt dirty just walking past the store (never mind that I was clueless as to the purposes of almost all of the garments in that store). I was incredulous that people would actually shop there, and those who were bold enough to do so must surely be prostitutes. Who else would wear such provocative underpants? Surely not I.

It's funny how things change. My unmentionables are now purchased strictly from Victoria's Secret (thank you, lingerie shower!) and what's worse, I am now an employee of this God forsaken store. Yesterday was my first day.

After watching almost two hours of training videos on how to measure a bra and the infinite number of styles Victoria has to offer, I was finally unleashed on the customers and instructed to fine-tune my bra measuring skills. (As if measuring someone's chest wasn't awkward enough, the uncertainty of a first day on the job makes it almost terrifying!) While waiting for further instructions from our co-manager, a client came up to me and asked if she could have a bra fitting. Maintaining my composure, I asked her to follow me to the dressing room area where I proceeded to measure, albeit flusteredly, her chest. When I pronounced her a 38C, she exclaimed, "YES! Yes, yessss!" while jumping up and down. Apparently it was better (and smaller) than the verdict of her previous measurement.
As I sent her into the fitting room with a box of 38C bras to try on, I realized that this job is not just about sexy little underthings to make your husband/ boyfriend/ lover (I won't go into the moral rammifications of the latter two) go crazy, but to make women feel good about themselves. According to my Victoria's Secret training booklet, over 75 percent of women wear the wrong bra size. Here, I realized, is an opportunity for me to help the endowment of the world (or at least of North Richland Hills) to find great support that looks spectacular and makes women feel spectacular too. Although I'm sure Royce Money would cringe if he knew I was working for Victoria's Secret, I am satisfied with the knowledge that I am changing the world - one brassiere at a time.


rachel said...

Hey Jess...it's so good to read on your latest happenings in life...I hear from Mark Lewis you and Clay are looking at buying the house of Gina's grandmother...well goodluck living next to my family...They are crazy...consider this your warning! Have fun at work and you can practice your bra fittings on me if you need to!

Jaci said...

Man, we could have used your skills in the 702 house when we were trying to rank ourselves!